My Biggest Fear of All

We all have things we fear in life, and I have several of them - my house getting broken into, my cats dying, an accidental pregnancy, hell even losing a limb. But tonight, I came face to face with my biggest, most horrendous fear of them all - COCKROACHES.

I was watching TV, minding my own business when I hear my cat playing with something. I thought it was one of those damned beetle-looking bugs that hang out around the light outside my house, but upon further inspection I saw that she was playing with a cockroach - and it was STILL ALIVE. Its little legs twitching *shudders*. I yelled at her, and what does she do? She grabs the damn thing with her mouth and runs under my bed with it. By this point, the fear really set it. I'm screaming like a maniac, I'm running around my house not knowing what it God's name I am going to do, and the tears come - uncontrollable sobbing. My chest and my arms begin to hurt and I'm thinking "great, heart attack here it comes". It's under my bed and both cats are playing with it. I call the only person that understands my deathly fear of them - my mother. Good 'ol mom, knowing exactly my love for these fucking things, is able to calm me down. And like a good roach scardey cat, there is no Raid.

People that have lived with me know that I am terrified, horrified by the sight of a roach, even a dead one. I mean, I'm okay with the sight of spiders, snakes, even bees, but roaches are a whole different game. As a kid, I grew up in an old house, and those bastards were everywhere. I think the fear really set in when I heard my aunt in our bathroom, yelling, and I ran in to find a fucking roach FLYING over her head. Some people don't understand or get it, but if you've ever seen someone deathly afraid of clowns react when they see one, that's me - only with roaches. I was crying to my mom, and it took every dram of courage to step foot into my bedroom and look under the bed. I don't know where it is right now - both cats are still under the bed but I don't know what happened to the spawn of Satan.

The non-medical name for the phobia of roaches is Blattodephobia (which in some circles is considered a made-up name). I know eventually I will have to somehow deal with it because I live alone and I will encounter them again ALONE. But tonight, it will remain under my bed, until one of the cats decides to leave it on my pillow when I wake as a nice present.

(for my own sanity, I decided to leave this post roach-image free. Instead, here is a picture of some kittehs)

Let me clear my throat.

Can I just say how much it really, REALLY pisses me off that people are getting 8 grand for free for buying a house? Fucking housing stimulus shit. I thought I got a pretty good deal for getting my house last year, AS IN 2008 - got me a nice tax credit, $7500 interest free loan that I can pay back in 15 years, yeah life aint that bad. Then the fucking shit hits the goddamn fan - anyone buying a house in 2009 GETS 8 GRAND FOR FUCKING FREE. Are you shitting me? Are you fucking shitting me? Why do these asshats get a free check and I'm the idiot having to pay back $7500 bucks because I missed the mark by 2 months? Am I the only one that feels jipped? I have to fucking constantly hear it OVER AND OVER for the next 7-8 months - "Oh lookey I bought a house and I got 8 grand for free!!" and I get the fucking urge to stab the person in the eye. I feel jipped. I am pissed. I don't want to hear about your fucking free money you asshole - unless you want to get an earload from me.

fuckshitcuntmotherfuckerihatethisshitdammittoshitforhell!!


/rant

Push It!

Um.....seriously? I mean, come on.....for real? Do you REALLY need to carry that iPod with you EVERYWHERE?

What's scary is that this thing boasts "waterproof speakers" - um. I have no more words.

And I don't WANT to know how filthy that iPod is going to be.

BAnn Coulter

Honestly, I don't know what to think of this idiot. I don't really pay much attention to her, but then something like this happens and I don't know whether I am pissed about it or I find it funny. Not sure. What this idiot is apparently sure of is that if women's suffrage never took place, there would be no Democratic party. And this, mind you, coming from a Republican hag that benefits from the 19th Amendment by being able to talk this crap and vote for that retarded president in office right now. Oh wait - she did vote but she did it illegally.

"If we took away women's right to vote, we'd never have to worry about another Democrat president. It's kind of a pipe dream, it's a personal fantasy of mine, but I don't think it's going to happen. And it is a good way of making the point that women are voting so stupidly, at least single women."

See that single gals? You are not voting properly!!

Oy, I already spent too much time on this hag. Moving on!!